It’s another anecdote that I felt like sharing because this is one of the best examples of a Filipino who owes someone money and wants to escape the responsibility.
Last Sunday I have an encounter of someone that tried to get out of the situation without wanting to pay the price of their being irresponsible by saying this classic phrase common when you want to insult someone back after they tell you the truth: “I KNOW YOU! I KNOW YOU NOW!”
Someone I know, that was given a 2nd chance and wasted it, stressed me out this weekend. The worst part is that this person, whom I shall call “M”, without even realizing the situation she was in, just call me and my husband basically, “loan sharks.” I guess, that was the trigger of everything. I found that unbelievably stupid because I remember on our side, how she made us play hide-n-seek since April. But I was stupider, because even after what she did, we still gave her a 2nd chance as she was recommended by a respected person. We also told her of the consequences of VERY late payments. The conclusion about her? She just do not listen because she doesn’t care. Why I can say she doesn’t care? My observation and my experience with her told me that she makes someone deal with her problems when she can do the dealing on her own. I can understand this behavior from a child, but not from an adult. That’s why I called her “irresponsible. And to call us “loan sharks”, was exaggerating because we do not do that. But my big guess is that she just calls someone she hates with “whatever names”, because it makes her feel righteous. I have to check the word she used on the internet and I figured out that it’s only valid to call her illiterate. There is a Filipino slang of calling loan sharks like how the Bombays in Philippines do it: it is called “5-6 money lending” Does anyone know about it?
Description of “5-6 Money lender”
“Five-Six Moneylenders. So-called because of the manner in which they lend, five-six (5-6) moneylenders charge a nominal interest rate of 20 percent over an agreed period of time. A person who borrows 5 pesos from a 5-6 moneylender over a period of one week repays 6 pesos, including 1 peso interest. Neither Filipino nor Indian 5-6 moneylenders require collateral or documents from their borrowers. The success of a borrower’s business and loan repayment history provide a gauge of the borrower’s credibility.”
The story this month?
I called M after not hearing from her for a long time. I mentioned about what I need and she told me she cannot get away from work yet. I also said that she will pay little amount for the delay, as it’s part of the deal. (She was 2 months delay, by the way.) But I asked her for 1 month delay extra we charge, only if she pays soon, like next Sunday. (This is the part that I didn’t explain to her very well – the soon is the upcoming SUNDAY (8th) and I also said that I’ll see her in person. I was expecting her to be back in the city that “next Sunday” because she mentioned that she “might” be back. So I agreed. But you know what, there is actually nothing to explain because it’s been explained BEFORE! I mean, there were 2 people that delayed also and they figured out that they have to pay a little bit for their delays. It was peaceful conversation and we parted without problems. Because they listened and remembered the deal.) The thing is, this M person had the guts to ask me to contact someone else to get what I need from her. I agreed first , because she said that she has money there. The thing was, this person she referred to, also referred me to another person. That’s when I realized how stupid it was. What am I a Secretary? So I left her a text saying that: I cannot do what she asked because I have to contact 2 people just for the little thing she owed us. So I will see her in person and will add 1 month delay extra on her debt, instead of 2 months.
She got a product from us in June 30. And it’s been 2 months and 1 day on September 1. She couldn’t figure out that she was given a chance for a short time only?
Still no reply from her. She had an alibi that she cannot get out of her workplace to buy a phone load, and I was stupid to believe it.
So a week passed, I didn’t see her; no news from her. Sunday passed, still nothing. I gave her occasional phone calls but they were unanswered.
Thirteen (13) days had passed.
My husband learned the actual months M was delayed. He insisted to message her that she will pay the “actual” delay amount, as everyone did according to agreement upon receiving the products we gave them. I told M about this, straight to the point but still polite. And she replied so soon, for the first time! It was also the same message which she called “what we’re doing is worst than 5-6”. She complained that “it’s just” 1 week passed, and we increased her monthly delay. She also said that she has no money and what’s in her pocket was enough to give me only. It doesn’t include the monthly delays yet.
Honestly, it was only an addition of 10 euro and she thought it’s WORST than 5-6? And besides that, me and husband do not know exactly about this “5-6 money lending style”, so right after reading the correct info how it was done, we realized that it’s not like us and it’s not our personality to be loan sharks. We have a part-time work. We were selling little things with right amount of price for very little profit. And we have decided to add the monthly delay payment because some people take advantage of us being nice and understanding and we ended up being paid very late . Anyway…
I figured out instantly what she was doing. Saying that her money was only enough to pay me, was her way of making me feel guilty. Won’t I feel guilty to get money from someone when I know that’s the only thing they have left? Normally, I would and not ask anything anymore. But this is business. And I have been taken advantage by several people in Greece because they are my friends so they can pay whatever time they want. And then this person wants to take advantage of me, too??? This scenariowais so familiar because in our country, this is common. But hey, we’re not in Philippines anymore. Even so, her attempt to fool me, was ridiculous.
Also, this person doesn’t know how to count days. Has it only been a week since she last heard from me? No. That was September 1. And Saturday was September 14.
After the many unanswered/ignored calls and texts spent to this M, we proved how irresponsible she is. No replies. No calls. One can easily give someone a quick call / text that will say: ” Can you please call me during this time?” BUT NOTHING from this person. It’s not like I got mad out-of-the-blue. I have a reason. Well more than just a reason. And those rooted from too much waiting, patience that’s been taken advantage, chances that were abused, and my money & time spent wasted.
The conversation went on. I found out more facts about her. One thing that caught my attention immediately was when she said, ” If I only knew you will add that much, I would’ve contacted the other person to pay you immediately.”
You see M is no doubt someone that waits for the worst to do their part. What did husband and I do to her to treat us like this? We gave her the products she wanted. And we let ourselves be taken advantage by her twice. Yes, TWICE.
I have accepted our mistakes for letting her mistreat us. So husband and I messaged her back what’s true only. We told her that we know now what an irresponsible being she is. Offended, she replied in this way: “And I also know you now.”
Come last Sunday, she said she will give us her payment, but her phone was closed and unreachable. We were back again to how she treated us the past months. We were guessing which church she went again. Fortunately, we were invited to a birthday party, and there she was. Sitting in a corner, gloomily. She obviously had talked about what happened to other people. Can’t she at least give us a call or text that she is at that place? Not only irresponsible but VERY and truly inconsiderate. And if we didn’t play detective, we wouldn’t even know where she is! This woman is making us do a lot of work for the little money she pays us, we thought.
I was about to asked her out when someone stopped me and told me that she doesn’t want to see me. She was right there already and she asked someone to pay for her stead. I thought that I should asked her out in person and we can talk privately. As soon as I approached her, she snapped at me. Almost shouting. I asked her politely if we could go out to talk privately and she replied, “what’s the point of talking when you know me already?”
I almost laughed because that wasn’t the whole point of our conversation yesterday. I asked my husband to asked her to talk outside. I also mentioned to her there’s a party going on so we will talk privately. But she kept saying, “Oh I know you, I know you now.” Oh man, I thought that this is definitely a classic way of denying/averting issues from the actual situation by letting other people see that they are being bullied. She tried to manipulate the situation, Filipino classic style that I know of. I decided that there is nothing to do with this bitch. She thinks she can do whatever she wants. She intentionally makes us look like we were bullying her when we were asking her to have a PRIVATE talk because we thought she needed to be explained again. We figured that much that there was no point to it. I realized though, that she chose to go to church to feel that she’s in safe haven from her sins. Some people told us to get out and leave her alone. Instead of telling her to come with us, which as one can see, is the proper way for adults to do. But instead we were shooed out and that’s when I felt I needed to let out my stress. This woman since April, has been torturing us. She is the worst customer we ever had. And I think she hasn’t realized that. The funny thing is, she has the classic attitude of Filipinos I know way back in Philippines. Especially when they want to avoid confrontations. They rather sulk in the corner and get the attention of others that they are pitiful and helpless, “look I am not doing anything to them, they’re the one who approached me!”, thus husband and I looked like “bullies.”
Later, husband couldn’t help himself; went back in, confronted her and she kept telling him: “Oh I know you two now!” And his reply to her was simple: what do you know about us? We know for sure that you are irresponsible, inconsiderate, and a bad payer. That’s all there is to it. There are other people who also worked away from the city this summer but they were considerate enough to let us know of their payment methods, or if they are going to be inconveniently delayed. If they can do it, why can’t you? You’re the one who did something wrong that’s why we are this way to you.
Sometimes we think that having these kind of people who make us feel down, is quite tiring – so we felt like stopping. But if we do the math properly, better people are more than the likes of M. So our experience with her, was one-of-a-kind and we will take it as a lesson in dealing with people. Filipinos or not, anyone can be like this. We’re more conscious now than, before. Our block list also grew. We are still nice. We are still understanding. But we hope not to let ourselves be victims with the likes of M and H, again.